We are not that far removed from a time when ambition was a dirty word for women. It was a word designed for men. Particularly for Black women, we have been almost afraid to admit that we want power, success and everything that comes with that. It's no doubt that we are ambitious but no one wanted us to admit it. Keep your mouth shut and stay in your place is basically what we've heard. We've learned to deal, adapt and stay on a flat, even path. There's reason for that. We don't want to be penalized when we succeed at tasks traditionally associated with men. What's more, we don't want to be labeled as combative or the Angry Black Woman.
Nevertheless, we pushed forward. The pandemic came and we started businesses, side hustles and even continued climbing the broken ladders and cracked ceilings via Zoom. We saw ourselves beyond what we ever could have imagined. We have owned our ambition and reframed what it means.
No sooner than your last Zoom meeting ended, we entered into an anti-work era and realized we needed rest. These days, it's not that we don't want to be ambitious. We don't want it in the traditional sense.
Women tend to have this idea that what we produce is our self-worth. We think we're just one achievement, one goal, one ambitious thing away from our best self. It tends to spill over into our relationships as well.
In a world that glorifies hustle culture and constant busyness, it's easy to feel overwhelmed and lost in the pursuit of success. The pressure to always be grinding, hustling, and achieving can leave us feeling burnt out and unfulfilled. But what if there's another way to approach life and goals? A way that doesn't involve constantly pushing yourself to the limits, but instead focuses on the concept of "soft ambition."
Soft ambition is a gentle approach to pursuing your dreams and goals, emphasizing contentment, balance, and well-being along the way. It's about setting realistic goals, prioritizing self-care, and understanding that success doesn't have to come at the cost of your mental and physical health. Soft ambition encourages you to move at your own pace, listen to your intuition, and find joy in the journey, rather than solely focusing on the destination.
There was a time when I glorified overworking, sacrificed personal time, and priortized productivity above all else. I relished in being "busy" and always had more irons in the fire than I could manage. Don't get me wrong, hard work is certainly important but the relentless pursuit of success at any cost led me to burnout, anxiety, and a sense of emptiness. The pressure to constantly hustle can take a toll on both your mental and physical well-being, leaving you feeling exhausted and disconnected from what truly matters.
You've heard Black women on social media talking about the soft life. Soft ambition offers a refreshing alternative to hustle culture. It encourages you to celebrate small victories, practice gratitude, and cultivate a sense of fulfillment in all aspects of your life. By embracing a mindset of soft ambition, you can pursue your goals with intention and purpose, while also honoring your need for rest, play, and self-care.
Practical Steps Towards Soft Ambition
Set Realistic Goals: Instead of aiming for perfection or setting unrealistic expectations, focus on setting achievable goals that align with your values and priorities.
Prioritize Self-Care: Make time for activities that nourish your body, mind, and soul. Whether it's practicing mindfulness, going for a walk in nature, or enjoying a hobby, self-care is essential for maintaining balance and well-being.
Practice Gratitude: Cultivate a mindset of gratitude by acknowledging and appreciating the blessings in your life, big and small. Gratitude can shift your perspective and help you find joy in the present moment.
Listen to Your Intuition: Trust your instincts and listen to what your inner voice is telling you. Intuition can guide you towards paths that align with your true desires and values.
In a society that often equates success with busyness and productivity, embracing soft ambition can feel like a radical act of self-care. By choosing to prioritize balance, well-being, and fulfillment, you are aligning with a different way of approaching life and goals—one that values the journey as much as the destination.
So, as you feel overwhelmed by hustle culture and the pressure to constantly be achieving, remember that there is beauty in soft ambition. It's okay to slow down, take a breath, and choose a path that honors your well-being and happiness above all else. What I know for sure is that success is not defined by how fast you get there, but by how well you live along the way.
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